The impending failure of same-sex marriage

Failure is imminent. As the newly-created subset of the institution of marriage, same-sex marriage will not succeed. Why? Simple. It cannot duplicate heterosexual marriage.

The propaganda laid out to the world was that homosexuals are just like heterosexuals and want the same long-term, monogamous, loving relationship enshrined in marriage. However, studies have not found faithful, lasting relationships to be the norm among homosexuals as the general rule. A large part of the reason is that the focus is on sex.

Focus on Sex

The typical Gay Pride parade is a display of nudity, cross-dressing, sexual expression, and sexual deviancy. These are not the types of displays that you would find at a Straight Pride parade, if straight people had them. The typical hometown parade is G-rated. The closest thing you get to heterosexual “pride” displays is the high school homecoming king and queen riding in a car together. The cheerleaders may wear skimpy costumes but that is about as close as you get to anything remotely sexual in nature. Hometown parades are a celebration of radical normalcy. These parades are populated by such “radical” groups as the local public service clubs, local veterans, some politicians, and churches. Lewdness is not welcome.

The contrasting parade illustrations can help us recognize the stark difference between the two “communities” as we might call them. The focus on sex is a self-centered focus. It exalts self-satisfaction above all else. It puts the pleasure of the adults in the relationship at center stage. Everything else turns around it. Thus, the relationship is off on the wrong foot at the outset.

Marriage Concepts

Unlike their homosexual counterparts, sex is not the major focus of heterosexual marriage. Heterosexuals have a very different mindset about marriage before they go into it. For them, marriage encompasses life itself. It comes with certain expectations of longevity, procreation, and fidelity. A brief outline of heterosexual marriage thought goes something like this: there is the dating, engagement, the marriage, the honeymoon, the first house, the first promotion, the first pregnancy, the first morning sickness, the birth of the first child, learning to be a parent, taking family vacations, saving for college, the first day of kindergarten, elementary school PTA meetings, middle school band concerts, high school activities, the ACT test, graduation, empty nest syndrome, the child’s fiancé, the child’s marriage, the first grandchild, and the retirement years.

Notice in that description how little time is focused upon the parents and how much time and energy is put into the children. The marriage begins with the couple alone and ends with the couple living alone after their child-rearing days are over. Only now, they have an extended family to care for and to support them as they age. This is a “whole life” experience where the role of sex was two-fold: to bond the couple and to produce children, which additionally bonds the couple as they unite around their offspring.

Mimicking Marriage

Homosexuals are now attempting to take heterosexual marriage as their standard and mimic it. Naturally, they can’t produce children on their own so either they are brought into the marriage from another heterosexual relationship, adoption, a surrogate, or IVF. But simply copying the heterosexual process by the unnatural introduction of a child does not change the initial focus on sex in the relationship nor can it lead to the same kind of parent-child bonding.

Inherent Dissatisfaction

Sexual satisfaction is not all that satisfying when you are doing it wrong. Simply on a pragmatic level, females have to use something to substitute for the male member and males have to treat other males as if they are females by using orifices that are not designed for sexual intercourse. There can never be a true bonding on the physical level. The couple does not have the necessary complementarity. It is a bit like mixing oil and oil. In the end you still have oil, just twice as much of it. Due to the high number of sex partners and the level of infidelity in the homosexual community, it is fair to say that sexual gratification is not the same as sexual satisfaction within these relationships.

It addition to the above, it must be reiterated that the sexual gratification of the adult homosexual couple can never lead to the production of children. If there are children involved, not more than one of the two adults can be biologically related to the child. There is not a bonding opportunity in looking at the child that the two of you created and debating whose eyes he has or from which side of the family he gets his height. This makes one of the “parents” a “step-parent” by default. It is very clear that step-parents are statistically much more likely to do harm to or even kill a child than the biological parent. This is especially true of men, which puts any child in a male/male household at higher risk. A study of heterosexual parenting conducted in Canada and Detroit found that the child with a step-parent was “40 to 100 times as likely to be murdered or maimed as those who live with two biological parents in the household.” Clearly there are issues of dissatisfaction when a non-biological parent is involved. The bonding that takes place between the heterosexual couple and the child cannot ever be attained by the homosexual couple.

Psychology

Dissatisfaction also arises because the psychological similarities of the same-sex couple is also lacking complementarity. It is a well-established fact that homosexuals have greater instances of mental health problems than their heterosexual counterparts. This is due, at least in part, to the fact that there is no counterbalancing influence from the person who is their psychological opposite. Men are more sexually driven than women. Women are more relationally driven than men. When the two are paired together, there is a moderating influence on one another. Apart from that influence there is a lopsided dynamic in the relationship. This is expressed in different ways between the two sexes.

Male homosexual conduct differs significantly from that of females in terms of fidelity within the marriage and the number of sexual partners over the course of a lifetime. Most male same-sex marriages are open marriages. This means the level of fidelity is very low. This is the pinnacle of the self-centered focus of homosexual behavior. The sexual gratification of the adults is primary. A preoccupation with sex leads to greater sexual deviancy as more and more is demanded in order to satisfy the appetite. There is no moderating female influence.

Female homosexual conduct is more faithful during the relationship than the males but less faithful than those in heterosexual marriages. The emphasis on relationship and self-worth causes the female relationships to break up rather quickly. The average relationship lasts about four years. Male relationships last longer on average but suffer from the high infidelity mentioned above.

Conclusion

Clearly neither of these arrangements is suitable for raising children, who take eighteen years to reach the bare minimum of legal adulthood. Heterosexual marriages are clearly superior in terms of their longevity, their fidelity, and their child-producing and rearing capabilities, the lifespan of the couple, the happiness of the couple, and the happiness and well-being of the children.

Those advocating for same-sex marriage would have us believe that there is no difference between the sexes. They want to pick and choose the elements of marriage that they can potentially accomplish (love, monogamy, longevity) while trivializing or ignoring those that they cannot. Simply attempting to mimic heterosexual marriage standards is doomed to failure since homosexuals cannot compete on the same playing field. They are not suitably equipped to do so either physically or psychologically. The history of same-sex relationships and marriages is against the longevity and fidelity they seem to seek. It is doomed to failure as an institution.

Moral of the Story

The moral of the story is simple: fighting the natural order of things only brings disaster and frustration. God created humans as male and female with the intention that they pair up in that manner. That can never be changed. Homosexuals who attempt to have what they cannot have will wind up with ongoing mental issues, suffer the ravages of the abuse of their bodies, and be no happier in the end than they were at the beginning. Ministers, counselors, friends, and family will be left to pick up the pieces. If you did not know before, NOW you know why.